If you read the blogs from the beginning you will remember that many of the blog posts were named by song lyrics, mostly because we did lots of driving to and from the hospital and in moments of deep thought, lyrics often resonated with me and made me emotional. Often I would be staring out of the window, tears streaming down my face because of a line in a song on the radio. I would make a note of it in my phone and it would blog that day. I know that reading the blogs, just like listening to the music – takes me right back there.
I composed a playlist of all of the songs from our blogs into an album for Austin and Rory’s Baptism and 1st Birthday as it was symbolic of our journey to that point.
Today I went for some well deserved pampering at Elm Villa Beauty and whilst I was lay on the bed with my eyes closed, I heard the lyrics ‘looks like we made it, look how far we’ve come my baby’ and instantly, tears were streaming down my face. The lady wiped away my tears, assuming my eyes were running from the treatment, and I just went along with it, but then the next song was ‘im only one call away, Superman got nothing on me’ and I couldn’t hold it back any more. I had to explain to the lady why tears were streaming down my face and I was completed choked. The lady switched the music over.
Becoming a parent; the IVF, miscarriages, premature birth, the tough few years and the challenges ahead have taught me so many life lessons and made me the best version of myself.
I am as strong as I ever need to be, I can handle whatever comes my way, but I will always carry the scars, and today they showed!
If you wanted to read the blogs from the lyrics I heard today, so you can see exactly what that music took me back to and where the tears came from. Here they are;